每个人的寂寞空虚。

我寂寞，寂寞就好。- 【Hebe田馥甄】

我渴望被重视，渴望被肯定。寻寻觅觅，找寻一个属于自己的知音，但是若真想找到一个，真正明白你，了解你，能够互相勉励你的知己。太难了吧？就算真的被你找到了，对方也未必当你是真正的知己。也许只能把你当成表面嘻嘻哈哈的朋友。

表面上，对没错，我是个傻大姐性格，爱玩，爱笑，疯疯癫癫的和不同堆的朋友混在一起。但是，就是没有一个能够让我真正敞开心扉，好好说话的好朋友。

人，都是寂寞的。就是因为那份寂寞，所以不断地寻找属于自己的知音知己、甚至是自己的另一半。当找到的时候，你会认为那份寂寞已被填满。

真的是这样的吗？你是不是也会有和我相同的感受？

当一个人逛街时，看到甜蜜恩爱的情侣，你不免会望着你左右手，想着属于那个会紧紧牵着你的手的人，在哪里？或者是，你已经找到了牵你手的他/她，但是此时此刻他/她却不在你身边，寂寞空虚的感觉全部袭击而来。

当你感到无助，难过，低潮的时候，你渴望他就在你身边，不需要太多的言语或安慰的话，只要静静的抱着你，抚摸着你的头，让你依赖依靠。

就算跟一堆朋友在一起时，表面上自己看起来很快乐，很满足，但是内心却更空虚。也许可以尝试不管那份寂寞空虚在心里叫嚣，但是换来的，却是自己的内伤。不管你怎么让自己快乐，让自己过得很充实，在人群堆里，会更觉寂寞空虚。

夜，尤其是深夜，是人最脆弱的时分。每晚，有多少人失眠，就只为了简单的理由 - 寂寞。 哭湿了枕头，慢慢的才入睡。或靠安眠药才能入睡。早上，我们还能逞强，还能抵抗那份寂寞，因为那些忙碌的生活，就是寂寞的抵抗力。

这个城市，大而空旷，而每个人的身上，都有那一份的空虚寂寞。
而这份寂寞，不曾停止过。
到了夜深人静的时候，这份寂寞空虚会更浓厚。

亲爱的，我好想你。

Final Exam Result + Outing with Yoanne

Wake up at 11 somthing this morning, then went to college to get my result slip. Garrghh.. I'm not enough sleep, headache. :-( Since last night keep worried about my result, keep praying that hope i won't fail for my final exam. I didn't beg for good result, but at least i pass my exam. Unfortunely, when i check through college computer since they said the result slip only will be release at 5pm evening. I checked, my total CGPA marks is only 1.38. I totally shocked and my tears almost ran out frm my eyes. But i controlled and asked myself not to cry or showing myself is weak and feel helpless. So, i smile and act like nothing in front of others.

I only fail one of my first sem final exam's subject, BEVERAGE STUDIES!! Well Mr Joykin =..= Thanks for not letting me pass your lovely dovey subject. I know you dislike me, and same as me too. *wink*

Then,

After i get my result, went for lunch with Jeff, Maw Maw, Corrine and Patrick. :) But then Yoanne msg me, told me she already arrived Times Square, watching movie with her friend. So when she come out, i meet her up and she joined us since I have order my lunch at restaurant.

Very first time hang out with her eventhough we know each other before both of us came KL. But then never have chance hang out together since both of us is busy for work and study.

She finding hair show model for coming 24th August. Actually is just a hair show competition,
so both of us meet up today and discuss for the themes and costume.
Will update u guys soon. *wink* Remain mysterious first, ngek ngek :-P

Saw both of our wearing? So match man. XD
My white small coat with floral trouser, and she wearing black jacket.
We have the same taste and sense in some of stuff,
such as our wallet.

Nelly & Yoanne ♥♥♥

Read this my readers

Dear all, pls take a few minutes to read this post, appreciate it alot. :)

I have added a new gadget - " FACEBOOK LIKE " at my every single post.

All facebook users, my friends or even net friends,
click like if you love my article through your personal facebook account
so that i know who you are. :D

If you like to know more how to add this gadget to your blog,
kindly refer to my babe's blog post : Hilary Giogio

Firstly, if u are the one who always read and follow my blog. I would like to said thank you with full of sincere heart. :) Especially for those who love my blog article, always leave comments to support and console me. I appreciate it alot, i mean seriously. :)

I know and i understand, it's not easy to make one person like you. As what usually people said, you can't force a person to like u if he/she is dislike u without any reason. So, for all of you who love me, i love you all too. But if, you hate or dislike me, it's ok i won't care or bother about it. I won't try to approach you to like me or whatever shit you hope i do for you.

Love me or hate me, still is an obsession. :P

Link my blog?

For all my precious readers that I don't know you in real life OR click my blog randomly*pass by someone blog or friend intro me to you* if you linked me at your blog, pls follow my blog. :) Because i won't simply linked every single person who linked me at their own blog. So the best way is follow my blog, then i can view ur blog easily. In addition, you may also received my blog updates' in first time.



Follow my twitter?

My twitter link --> Click here

My twitter will be update daily,and of course I always have craps at there. If u play twitter, may follow my twitter to get my latest news or even my sharing story. Blog is the place that i share something important, but twitter is the place i always craps and chat.

So, catch me up there. ;-)



My Facebook Fans Page?

Well, i'm not celebrity or even a famous or public person, i'm just a small character in this world. And i believe no matter how famous, rich, famous, pretty or handsome you are, you are still a small character in this world. Am i right?

So, my personal facebook account full and i can't approve any friend requests anymore. So i create a fans page for myself. Quite shy and embrassed when open this page. Teehee :P

So my dear all, pls like my fans page and pls STOP ADDING MY FACEBOOK PERSONAL ACCOUNT. I seriously won't approve your friend requests except if you are my real life friend.

So,what you waiting for?
Catch me up
and get my new updated through
i mentioned above's three ways!
Have a nice weekend.

死变态佬 （︶︿︶）＝凸

最近怎么那么衰，是怎样，我犯小人哦？╮（╯＿╰）╭
说笑说笑，我是基督徒，不信犯小人这些东西。只是最近的我，倒霉透了。

今天遇到个变态佬，他x的!!

宝贝老公最近爱上sdo-x，之前其实自己也有玩过，可是那时候玩久了，腻了，又觉得sdo很浪费电脑容量，就把它uninstall了。而现在我的男人喜欢玩，我也想陪陪他玩。因为家里的线真的很不好，下载到一半就会断线，所以我就只好去网咖下载sdo-x的installer。

结果到了那里，找到位置坐下来，突然有个男人坐在我隔壁的位置。我也不以为意，以为他应该也是来上网的顾客，没多加留意。刚好那时，我又听着mp3，网咖又人多吵闹，那男的竟然盯了我很久。本来没有留意他，结果被他这样一看，是人都会感觉的吧？如果有人一直盯着你看，你也会有感觉啊。我当没看到，结果他还和我打招呼，一直跟我说hi。(hi屁咩“麻拉佬”，想要我扁你啊?找死啊。)


其实当时心里是害怕的，但只能告诉自己不能表现自己是害怕的。不然那个男的只会得寸进尺。我就走到柜台，要求换位置，结果那男的还跟了过来。我心里不断os，三字经全部涌完出来。是怎样啊，人家都已经换位了，他怎么还跟过来。我只好忍气吞声，当他没到。


好了，坐了下来，他也在我旁边坐下。怎么那么倒霉，旁边的位置竟然是空的。幸好当时自己有携带mp3，也没有收起来，就假装继续听着，管他三七二十一。他敢碰我，就不得好死。(￣^￣)凸

我在猜想啊，他应该是“痴线”的，也或许是个变态。他就这样在那里死盯着我看，然后一直跟我打招呼。我不理他，他就在那里自言自语，甚至傻笑。我真的好无言啊。我连正眼都不敢看，就是怕他和我说话，可是我一斜视，就可以看到他在干嘛。突然，他冒出一句“sawadikap”。(-_-;) 冷到~~ 当时的我，真的是哭笑不得。


慢慢的，我不理他，他应该不耐烦了。我正在用mouse的时候，他竟然用他的手指来碰我的手。妈的妈的!我真的超级想一个拳头给他。当我是女生，就好欺负啊？当然这些事发生的时候，老公在msn陪我聊天。他一直劝我，哄我，叫我不要冲动，就我不要理那个变态佬。我怎么可能不理嘛？我再不理，就怕他会得寸进尺。刚开始我还能忍，他碰我，我给他脸色看，他就不敢再碰。安静了一下，结果他还是碰，我忍不住，把mouse丢在桌子上，怒视着他。结果他看着我，跟我笑，还跟我说hi。我真的是%$#@#$%^&*Y%$#@!

要不是老公叫我沉住气，不要跟他吵，我也不想让他担心，我早就“大开杀戒了”。

后来，他再也不敢怎么样，就静静地坐在位子上。时不时还是会一直和我说hi，我还是不理他。结果，他还在我面前戴黑眼镜给我看。一时脱，一时戴，天啊，当他自己是什么？明星啊？长得一副死人样，还敢在我面前戴冒牌眼镜。有种人，就是想打他，没什么原因，就是样衰。=..=

后来，他应该因为玩不出什么把戏，就走了。离开前，还摸了我的脸，还跟我说再见。老娘我不发威，你当我是病猫啊！你把女生当什么？简直就是欠揍！如果下一次再被我遇见你，我不会再对你客气。

气 气 气 气 气 气 气 气 气

可以有个小小的，顽皮的念头吗？:-P
也许我应该找几个人，一起拿个麻布袋袭击他，一起围殴。打到我气消了，再放了他。*我知道不可能，而且我也不会这样做。这只是一个“安慰”自己的方法。我绝对反对暴力的哦，只是对于这种死变态，不需要客气!*



注意 ：

各位乡亲父老，大姐大哥，小弟小妹，
我真的不是个暴力的人。我也不是一个不讲道理，凶巴巴的人。
人家其实很温柔。
*屁啦!* （＃￣▽￣＃）　

拜托不要有下一次了 =..=

今天的照片哦 ♥♥♥

亲爱的大家，今天来一篇中文的文章。

我，真的很不爽，不爽到了极点。

先来说说今天的故事，再来继续发牢骚吧。=..=

星期六，12.45pm，收到一位agent的邀请试镜的简讯。我看了看，casting的日期是从星期五开始，而星期日就结束了。基于种种问题，我无法做决定：

1. 总所周知，通常这些试镜的地点都是在 Damansara地区，我住在Cheras地区，若要去Damansara的话，真的是他x的远。况且，那里的公共交通根本不方便。

2. 其实如果星期日去试镜还来得及，但是若我一个人去的话，我一定会害怕，所以我就找Karina陪我一起去。但是Karina也因为不方便，而我也是last minute才通知她，所以就不了了之了。

我心里其实很想去，只是没有朋友做伴，当然会害怕啦。虽说是 CELCOM tvc & advertisement的试镜，但谁能保证一定安全呢。讨论之后，我就回复那位agent的简讯，告诉他我们无法出席这次的试镜。过不久，他再回复我的信息，告诉我试镜会延期到星期一。意思是说，星期一我们还能去试镜。我询问Karina的意见后，她说ok，那我当然也ok啦。就这样抱着满心期待，等到试镜会，就是今天。

转了两趟火车，抵达我们约在一起见面的地方，然后说好一起搭taxi去目的地。我们两个都没去过这个地方，只能跟着agent给我们的地址走。我们两个，包括司机先生都像个“盲头苍蝇”似的兜来兜去，最后才找到目的地。

结果去到那边的时候，知道发生什么事吗？猜猜看呗 ~


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结果是：

负责人告诉我们，试镜会已经结束了。就在昨天（星期日）结束了，我心里顿时冒出许多符号，@#$%^^%$!@#$%^&*@#$%^&*(&%@! ，哦鸡巴啦什么都冒出来。是怎样啊？这里说结束了，我打电话询问agent时，结果说还没结束，弄得我们两人都不知如何是好。

该离开吗？（已经大老远走过来，还是等待agent和负责人联络好，再做决定)
该留下吗？（负责人已经说了，试镜会已经结束了，我们留在那里是干嘛？"衬托"meh)

等了又等，另外一位看起来职位比较高的aunty走出来说，： “ Girls,our casting already closed yesterday. Sorry ya girls,we can't do anything ” 就这样，把错愕的我们丢在门口。我很冷静，表面冷静的很，当然还是要保持那种落落大方的姿态，心里已经冒出一大堆的 WTH，WTF的字母。哈哈哈



后来的情况，我用我和那位agent的简讯来让大家知道 ：

Me : Mr xxxx, so how is it? Another person come and told us the casting is over. So how now? Should we go back or wait here? Agent : So sorry,they are closed.
*这就是所谓的“道歉”*，看到他这种不负责任的回复，我心里的火更大。 接着，我继续回复他 ： Your information message that told me about the casting is until today. When i arrived here, you told me the casting is closed. So now i need to waste double money and energy to go back without get anything back.
*亲爱的大家，我会这样说，并不是我志在必得自己一定会在试镜会成功。但是至少如果早知道是这样的话，我就不必费神费力气费金钱，又是搭地铁，又是搭的士，千里迢迢跑来这里试镜。就算不能成功，至少我有机会试镜，至少我是心甘情愿的来，心甘情愿的回去。不是吗？ *

做agent的，如果你希望你的模特儿是心甘情愿，开开心心的为你做工的话，那么就请你拿出你的责任感，还有肯定性的资料提供给模特儿。模特儿也是人，她们并不是白白的为你们打工赚钱，你赚的一定不比她们的酬劳少。不是一句简单的道歉，就能弥补一切。请对自己的工作负责，对自己的模特儿负责任。如果你继续保持这种心态工作，相信我，总有一天你会因为这种态度而失败。

　

Magazine Shooting Job + Latest Look

Hang out with my pretty Shindy today. :-)
Went to Sg.Wang together with her to buy her friend's lens,then we went for lunch.
Have a nice talk with her.
After finish our lunch, go to the nearby LRT station and went back together.


Today's outfit :

Simple is my favoutite type of outfit. ;-)
I love my handbeg,my blouse and my hp. *wink*
MY FAVOURITE COLOUR : PINK

13th of August,

let's share about yesterday stuff.

I went for my very first magazine photo shooting job. Thanks for Anis intro this job to me. Be honest, at first i thought is fashion wear for the shooting, at last went there just knw is wear Baju Kurung & Baju Kebaya,somemore with Tudung. OMG =..=
I really laugh of loud that time, the assistant said i look alike ARAB ppl when i wear tudung. LOL! xD

My photos will be release at October's issue, NONA magazine. excited excited excited. Hope i won't look alike weirdo. will be update u guys when i get the photos. ;-)

Stay tuned. xoxo


The latest me, (after i take off my extension hair and straighten my hair.)








That's all for me today. Chiaoo. :-D

I don't want to miss one thing =)

It's time to update my bloggie again,

I having my sem break for 2 weeks.

Quite panic and worry for my first sem final exam's result,sighh. Hope that i will at least pass all my subjects,so that i no need retake any one of the first sem subject. GBM :-(

Recently addicted to Yuna Ito's song : I don't want to miss a thing.

For me,
Yuna Ito's version is much more better then Aerosmith's version.
But both of them bring the different feeling to me, and of course,
both of them are awesome.
Aerosmith is more to rockness,but Yuna Ito has her own style to sing this.

Still,
i prefer Yuna Ito's version, i love this song sooooo much. ♥ ♥ ♥
I hope to sing to hubby if he is beside me,i miss him so much.

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While you're far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Where every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

Don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby and I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you the sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing

Lying close to you feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever, forever and ever

I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby and I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you the sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing

I don't wanna miss one smile, I don't wanna miss one kiss
I just wanna be with you, right here with you, just like this
I just want to hold you close, feel your heart so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment for all the rest of time

Don't wanna close my eyes, don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby and I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you the sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing

I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby and I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you the sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing

I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep
Yeah, I don't wanna miss a thing